Daily Post – Countless

Today’s Prompt is Countless………..where to start?

There have been countless times in my life where that question has been foremost in my mind and in days gone by I have just simply given up on the harder, complex tasks, as I simply did not know where to begin.
Countless times I have shrugged my shoulders in apathy and not helped when I could have; it was not my problem.
Countless days where I have put things off til tomorrow, knowing tomorrow never really comes……..because I had plenty of time.
Countless times where I was selfish, and times when I was not selfish enough.
Countless times where I should have seized the day or simply told someone how much they meant to me

All because I thought I had countless days to achieve; then the reality of my own mortality came crashing down on me and I nearly had it all snatched away from me, I was lucky it was just a wake up call. Now I seize each and everyday as a new adventure, you never know how many more adventures there are to come. Every person in my life knows exactly how I feel and telling my children that I love them is a daily occurrence (Even when I get mad). I try to help others when I can, even if that means working for nothing, offering some advice or sometimes just listening and being there………it might not sound a lot but to some it is everything. I try not to put anything off, even something boring like cleaning out the garage or getting the car serviced; just do it. Once it is done you can mark it off your list, each and every time you get something done, it makes the list smaller and feel more manageable. And if, like the garage, it seems an overwhelming task, start small, pick one spot and start there, then move onto another spot, eventually it all gets done. Ask a friend to help, sure it might be boring, but at least you can chat and have a laugh……….perhaps you can help them with their project too.

Then there are the times when I need to be less selfish as a person, I think we are all a little guilty of that. I am not a bad person and I bet you are not either, it’s just that sometimes we get so wrapped up in our own little world, we don’t see others on the outside of our bubble. I still suffer from this, but I try to see the bigger picture. I have met so many people over the last 2 years and I try to be friendly and non judgemental (good lord some people make it difficult). I try to be open and communicative and thoughtful of their needs, as opposed to doing what seems best for me, my family and friends. I am not applying for good samaritan of the year here, just trying to offer value within my own community. To be honest, sometimes it just feels good to do something for someone else.

Lastly, I try to be only as selfish as I need to be, sounds silly? As a Mum and Wife I have spent 25 years doing everything for them and rarely for myself. So now I take a little bit of time each day, just for me, sometimes a day or two here and there, just for me. A quiet coffee in the morning without interruptions, a day spent just playing in the studio (heaven). I still do most of the cooking, the cleaning, shopping etc. But I need time just to BE. That took me a long time to figure out. Ask any Mum…….it’s hard to put yourself first and then after years, it becomes a habit.

So be bold, be brave, love and enjoy life………it’s a journey and no one gets out alive anyway!

-Julz