Contemplation – Week 13

Every week Desley brings us a new thought to ponder and contemplate from her KikkiK Journal;

The prompt I’ve chosen for this week is: What was the mood of the day?

My mood for today, is tired……….is that even a mood or just a state of being? I am happy and relaxed (for the most part – I’ll explain in a bit), I just spent a very enjoyable weekend with some friends in Warburton, Victoria. We have lots of fun and LOTS of laughs; laughter really is good for the soul isn’t it? I had just received some bad news I was in no way ready to accept and take on board and I just wanted to spend the weekend NOT thinking about it; selfish? Yes probably, but sometimes you just have to be.

We have just found out my Dad has MND, it’s a horrible debilitating disease with no cure and no real treatment. Dad lost his Mum to MND, nearly 30 years ago, they are no exactly sure if it’s hereditary, in fact they don’t really know all that much about it. My Grandmother wasn’t even diagnosed until after she died, at the time they just thought it was simply dementia (I think part of it was). So with Mum’s failing health, I now have Dad’s as well. My Brother (who I never see or speak to) is pretty much useless, and my health is not brilliant either, I certainly can’t do their housework (can barely do my own), I can’t help gardening and I certainly can’t help with bathing and such down the line, so we need to make some serious decisions and quite frankly I wasn’t ready to take it all on board.

So I guess my mood now is anxious and worried. When it gets a little much and I find myself tearing up, I think back on a funny moment from the weekend just past, and it certainly improves my mood. There is nothing like romping through a forest in the dark with torches whooping and yelling and laughing like a bunch of teens to make a pretty funny weekend. Some of it was ‘you had to be there moments’ and I don’t think I could explain if I tried, others were exhilarating and some just mere companionship. 4WD through Alpine Forest was fun and wandering through rain forests with cameras in hand, walking, looking, finding mushrooms, toadstools, waterfalls and moss frozen on trees was wonderful. Hunting for bargains in antique and junk stores, so much fun (I got a few bargains too). Dinners and late night story swapping with copious amounts of alcohol……was loads of fun too. Just being in each others company, walking forest trails and pointing out photographic delights. And then there was the light painting, pure thrill and joy.We don’t do a lot of light painting, we don’t have the tools or skill for some of it, but when you go away with two experts, it can be fantastic fun!

So I guess to some it up I am tired, happy, relaxed, anxious and sad…………..it’s funny how you can be so many things at once.

~ Julz

 

 

 

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